Asshole of the Year
by blue-leagues
Summary: Kenny McCormick is a generally happy-go-lucky kind of guy. However, he's had his fair share of rejections in the past year, and that can really damper someone's mood. Will he ever fall for someone who isn't a complete asshole? One sided K2, one sided Stenny, and one sided Crenny, with a few side pairings here and there. Who will he eventually end up with? You might decide!
1. Contestant 1 Part 1

_**a book con?**_

_**Yeah! It'd be fun**_

_**ok yeah lets go :D**_

_I finish typing my reply and a grin sneaks its way on my face. I've only ever been to one convention in my life, which was unsurprisingly fantastic, so another one doesn't sound so bad. Plus, it'd be a chance to finally hang out with Kyle Broflovski. I had talked to Kyle in person around twice since I moved to South Park a year earlier, and both times were just a polite "hello". I knew Kyle by association; he was a close friend of one of my close friends, but we didn't have any classes together, so we never got the chance to get close. However, we've been chatting a lot online throughout the summer. It started off with simple chitchat through Facebook, which later evolved into Skype calls, and now we're planning our first event together. Needless to say, I can't wait for the convention! Now to raise some money so I can go..._

"Kenny wait up!"

I turn around to catch a glimpse of Kyle waving at me as the memory fades away.

"Hurry up you doofus!" I tease back wearing that same grin from months ago.

Who would have thought that first hang out at the convention would have been the start of a beautiful friendship? We hit it off even better than we did online and have been inseparable ever since.

"You ready for art club?" Kyle asks as he reaches me, glancing at me with those vibrant green eyes. Funny, I usually don't notice people's eyes, but Kyle's are just so…green that I can't help it.

"You betcha!" I reply smiling at him. I seem to be smiling every time I'm around Kyle lately, even more so than I used to. It's really odd.

After a couple of minutes of comfortable silence walking towards our afterschool class, Kyle speaks up, squealing in excitement, "Oh oh guess what? Stan called me last night! Oh man we talked for so long it was great and…"

Ugh, not this again. Stanley Perfect Marsh. Kyle's not-so-secret secret crush.

I've known about Stan for a good while now, since Kyle tells me everything of course. Stan is a year older than us and in high school already, which means they don't get to see each other as often as before, but according to Kyle they "are still as close as ever". Bluh. I've never actually met Stan, but by the amount Kyle talks about him, he must be an angel sent from the heavens. It used to not bother me when Kyle talked about him; it amused me even. Now, for some reason, whenever Kyle even says his name, I get really, really irritated. But it's normal to get a little jealous right? Friends get jealous all the time. Yeah.

Oh oops Kyle just asked me something. "Mh hmm," I nod with a smile, not even sure what I'm agreeing with. Kyle smiles back so I guess I answered correctly.

* * *

**A/N: Hello! The blue-leagues here c: First off, I just want to thank you for reading that little starter chapter. Secondly, this is my first fanfiction ever and I'm excited to continue it! I have most of the plot outlined, except for the ending. That's where you, the reader, if you choose to stick along with me on this fun ride, will come in. This story will involve three crushes with three rejections. I know how each segment of each rejection is going to go. However, I don't have an ending. Sooooooo, when I get to that part (which is many, many chapters away, as I anticipate this will be a long fanfiction), I will take ask my readers (if I get lucky enough to have any lol) to tell me how THEY think it should end! Hopefully this plans works, but right now I don't have to worry about that, I just have to worry about getting these chapters done haha.**

**A couple of things I want to mention as well. In my story, Kenny hasn't lived in South Park since he was born. He moved to the redneck mountain town before starting seventh grade, and most characters are currently in eight grade. Stan is in ninth because it'll make sense in the story ok shhhh just trust me on this.**

**Anyway, reviews are always welcome! c:**

**Also, future author notes won't be this long, I promise…**


	2. Contestant 1 Part 2

"What are you doing here?" An expressionless young teen greets me after knocking on his door several times.

"Now come on, that's no way to greet your best friend, Craigers!"

"Don't call me that dick face," he simply states before making an attempt to slam the door in my face. My foot, however, gets in the way of his plans.

"You really need to learn some manners, Craigers," I smirk at him, opening the door further and striding in. I make a beeline for his couch, where two PlayStation controllers are already set up, and fall backwards on it. "Could you get my a Coke?"

"Get it yourself," Craig frowns, kicking my legs off his spot and sitting down.

"I'm a guest, therefore you have to give me what I want."

"Not if said guest spends most of his time here anyway."

"Please?"

"No."

"Pretty please?"

"No."

"I'll give you a kiss~"

"Fuck no."

Seeing as I wasn't going to change the stubborn boy's mind, I sigh in frustration and get up. "Gosh, making me walk all the way to the fridge. How cruel!"

"Yeah yeah, you're a big baby, we know. Now what was it you wanted to talk about?" Craig questions when I get back. I sit back down, this time resting my feet on the brunette's lap, earning me a middle finger.

"Oh right. That." I look away guilty, not mustering the strength to come out and say what I came to say. I practiced this in my head all night, so why can't I say it now? "Yeah never mind."

"Aw come on now. You can't spark my curiosity and then not tell me."

A few minutes pass before I speak up again. "….Fine." I take a deep breath, close my eyes, and force all my willpower to say, "I like Kyle!"

I look over to observe his reaction, fearing the worst. All I get is his usual stoic expression and a- is that a smirk? "Well it's about time you came to terms with your gayness. I swear I've never seen anyone as obvious as you are around Kyle."

"So you're okay with me being gay?"

"Duh. You're still the same loser as always, that's not gonna change just cause you're gay, " he snickers. I frown and punch him in the shoulder, but then grin back. I should have known Craig wouldn't care; he doesn't care about anything.

"Now that you know my deepest secret, Craig Tucker," I announce dramatically, "you must help me win over Kyle's heart and make him mine!"

"Dude, that's so gay."

I roll my eyes and continue. "I'm actually not sure if I should tell him. What if he rejects me? He seems like he could be interested, but then there's Stan of course, but you can like more than two people right? But what if he makes fun of me? I mean Kyle wouldn't do that, but he might pity me, which is just as worse. I'm not even sure if I really do like him. Like what if I'm confusing these feelings of friendship with feelings of love? Oh god did I say love? I can't possibly LOVE him that's way too far and what i-"

"KENNY!"

I shut up instantly at one look of Craig's irritated glare. "Sorry," I mutter, but snort at his expression. "You look ridiculous dude. Turn that frown upside down," I add, poking his check.

He slaps my hand away with a grunt. "First of all, I really couldn't care less about your pathetic love life. Secondly, it's obvious that Kyle likes you back, so stop being a pussy and tell him. Sure he likes Stan, but Stan's in high school, and a relationship with someone that you can see everyday is better than a relationship with someone you talk to occasionally on the phone."

"That doesn't sound like not caring, Craig."

"Do you want my fucking help or not?"

"Okay okay!"

"Here's what you're gonna do. Kenny, are you listening? Stop smirking and pay attention. You and Kyle are going to a stupid (It is not stupid!) play soon right? Well, tell him then."

"Ehhh. I think I'll pass."

"Kenny, if you don't do it, I am going to tell everybody I know about your little secret."

"Everybody you know? That's like, what, five people?"

"And I will also beat you up."

"Oh please, you can't beat me up."

"Can so."

"Nu uh."

"Wanna see?" and with that the little shithead tackles me to the ground. I squirm under him and try to kick him in the face, but he doesn't budge and has my arms pinned to my sides.

I notice our positions and wiggle my eyebrows at him. "Oooh Craig getting all dominant on me now? People might get the wrong idea~"

"Pff as if I'd ever be with a bastard like you," he smirks down at me, then gets up, kicks me for good measure, grabs one of the controllers, and settles back on the couch. I sit upright and grab the other controller.

"You might have unfairly beaten me just now, but I'm so gonna beat you in Black Ops!"

I lost (again) but at least now I had a plan for my Kyle situation.


End file.
